Dreamers Often Lie
by wolf with panther eyes
Summary: He wanted these feelings to stop. Why wouldn’t they just stop! It’s not like anything would come of them... Arthur/Merlin, don't read if you don't like. One-shot.


I've been looking for an excuse to give a fanfic this title.

Please R&R, and enjoy!

* * *

Arthur was angry.

It wasn't his usual type of anger, which was usually just exaggerated annoyance. No, this wasn't that at all. Arthur wasn't sure what he was feeling, but he had to put a name to the emotions that were churning through him, to the uncomfortable prickling of his skin and his struggles to keep his breathing under control. It was all…

No. No, Arthur would not even think his name. If he did, his feelings would be sure to run unchecked.

He couldn't be in love with him, dammit! He was the Crown Prince of Camelot. Arthur had been attracted to women ever since he had hit double figures, and possibly before. So _why _was he even thinking about _him_ in this way?

He had dismissed the early dreams as stupid fantasies, the cause of sleeping on too much ale. But then _he_ had dressed Arthur one morning,and it was all the prince could do not to rip his servant's clothes off and have him there and then. Arthur wanted him. He wanted him badly. He wanted to run his hand across the pale skin, grasp the raven hair, kiss that mouth…

Hopefully _he_ hadn't noticed the effect he had on Arthur. Maybe he didn't notice the way Arthur struggled to stop shivering as he laced on Arthur's armour. Maybe…

Arthur groaned, pressing his forehead against the window. His skin cooled slightly against the glass, but Arthur continued to shiver with desire.

Oh, what was the point? He was going to think his name. Hell, he was going to _say_ his name. What was stopping him?

Arthur breathed in deeply. His knuckles gripped the windowsill harder, turning them white as he whispered the name of the man who was haunting him. "_Merlin…_"

It made it worse. Arthur closed his eyes, biting his tongue sharply. He wanted these feelings to stop. _Why _wouldn't they just stop?! It's not like anything would come of them! Merlin - Arthur shuddered lustfully once more - trusted Arthur as a friend. If Merlin even knew that Arthur felt this way, Merlin would probably leave Camelot tomorrow. Better to be away from the maniac prince.

If only…

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Merlin pulled the covers up tighter around himself, his eyes closed. This was wrong, he knew it. But he couldn't stop thinking of Arthur, and his thoughts were not those of an innocent manservant towards his master.

Merlin curled himself up under the blankets, his knees resting against his chest. _Arthur… _The name resounded around his head, as did an image of Arthur's smirking face.

Merlin wasn't quite sure what had happened to make him suddenly fall in love with Arthur. Arthur had just been an annoying prat, and now… Now, Merlin didn't know what to think. He only knew one thing, and it horrified him.

__

I am in love with Arthur.

Merlin screwed his eyes up even tighter.

__

But I can't be!

The Great Dragon had told Merlin that Arthur was his destiny. Was this what he meant? Not for Merlin to simply save Arthur repeatedly, but for Merlin and Arthur to be… lovers?

Merlin groaned, biting his lower lip. He longed for Arthur so much it hurt. But Arthur was the Prince, and would never think of him in that way. If Merlin told Arthur that he loved him, Arthur would immediately fire him, and probably banish him from Camelot. And that would be even worse, being unable to see Arthur ever again - to never hear his voice, or set eyes on him.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Arthur waited from Merlin to enter his room, preparing himself. _He's your servant! That's all he is,_ Arthur told himself firmly, just as Merlin walked in.

The early morning sunlight glinted across Merlin's features, and Arthur almost gave in at that moment, only stopping himself from grabbing his manservant at the last minute. "Merlin," he said shortly, concealing his emotions as usual. "You're late."

Merlin had also prepped himself up outside. Seeing Arthur again however, had almost thrown him off guard. He paced over to the pile of clothes scattered on Arthur's bed. _Arthur just lunged towards me,_ he thought to himself, his heart beating faster. _Does that mean…? No. Shut up, Merlin._

Arthur turned his head away, glaring at the opposite wall. Anything was better than facing his servant when he knew that he couldn't have him. "Feeling particularly slow today are we, _Mer_lin?"

Merlin bit his tongue, hiding the grin that had appeared on his face as he turned to face Arthur. "No, sire. Not at all." Slowly, he stepped towards Arthur, holding up one of Arthur's shirts. "How 'bout this?"

Arthur glanced at the shirt. "Fine, whatever." He glanced away as he removed his nightshirt and tossed it onto a nearby chair.

Merlin struggled to breathe as he pulled Arthur's shirt over the prince's head. His hands brushed Arthur's chest accidentally, and both boys flinched at the touch.

"Merlin," Arthur muttered, still refusing to look at his manservant in case his passion for Merlin took control. "I must have almost fired you half a dozen times. Why do you keep coming back?"

Merlin swallowed, laughing nervously. "Well, you keep your socks very clean," he joked, wincing slightly. He'd already used that line on Gwen.

"Merlin," Arthur said more firmly. "I'm being serious."

Merlin paused in his unwrapping of Arthur's trousers. "Well, err…" He busied himself again, then turned to Arthur suddenly. "Look, Arthur, I've seen who you are, and what you can do. I just want you to know that I'll be there for you, always." He stopped, breathing in deeply as he backtracked his words. "Always," he echoed softly, and he meant more in that one word. It was Merlin's way of saying what he really wanted to say - _Arthur, I love you!_

That did it for Arthur. He turned, glaring at Merlin. "What are we _doing_?" he growled fiercely. Merlin stared at him in surprise. "Merlin, I don't know if you feel the same…"

Arthur reached out and grasped Merlin's jacket, pulling him closer. Their faces were barely a pin's length apart; Merlin's was flushed, his blue eyes wide as Arthur gazed at him through lighter, narrowed eyes. "But you know what?" Arthur whispered, and Merlin could feel Arthur's breath warming his lips as their faces drew even closer together. "I _don't care_."


End file.
